Normally I'm a very "stick to your beliefs" kind of a person. But I recently made a decision that went against everything I knew and trusted in. I was trying to be a risk taker, part of the 'in' crowd, trendy if you will. And I can now share with absolute certainty, that you have values for a reason -- they should never be put aside just to be "cool".
I just didn't think the consequences would be that great. I thought I would just try it once, because so many other people like it, and then I wouldn't have to do it again, or I might even like it, and it might even be good for me!
No.
Big Mistake.
I bought banana walnut oatmeal squares. From Costco.
I don't know what on earth possessed me but it had to have been evil. I have known for more than twenty years that bananas are a plague. They contaminate everything they come in contact with and thus can only be eaten by themselves and then disposed of immediately and far from your vicinity or they continue to contaminate from the grave! Nuts also are of a contaminatory nature and should be eaten alone as well (if not covered in chocolate). They should never be anywhere near something as precious as a brownie and trail mix is pushing it. (On a more personal note, walnuts are my least favorite nut.) Again. What was I thinking?
Here's what happened. First, since it was Costco, the offending oatmeal squares were packaged with similar oatmeal squares with chocolate chips. Who doesn't want those? Second, I rationalized how healthy oatmeal is for you especially when paired with a nut, because as I've recently learned the good things in oatmeal combined with the good things in nuts creates the entire spectrum of good proteins you need to fight things like bad cholesterol and all those other things. And then my kicker thought was, "really, how bad could these things really be?"
Then yesterday I ate one. And they were everything I imagined they would be. Now I have like 20 more to choke down. These things better be damn healthy for me.
12 comments:
Well, funny. Especially contamination from the grave, because bananas do truly continue to let you know of their presence until the garbage bag is removed from the premisis and whisked away to the landfill. However.
I dearly love banana anything, and I think nuts only improve upon what they are combined with. So, I must disagree with you whole heartedly.
Funny though. This is why I will not ever eat sushi. I only know of two people in this universe that like it for real and not because it's the cool thing to eat(Kara & her silly child that I dearly love, lol!), and that's not enough of a majority for me!
So stick to the guns you armed yourself with long ago, and don't eat things merely because it's the cool thing to do.
I'll eat them, send them my way. Banana laffy taffy has been my favorite thing forever, so, I liked banana things before anyone else did. And just as an aside, you are truly odd for not liking nuts! But you like *gag puke ick nast* crunchy cookies, so I can't say I'm surprised.
And as another aside, contaminatory is my new favorite word. Say that one out loud to yourself and love. Just like malevolent.
maybe if you just think hipster thought whilst you eat them, then maybe they will taste better...doubtful, but worth a try maybe?
i should have stopped you. too bad. at least you have ghiradelli brownies to balance out the yuck!
My step-dad will eat anything if its healthy. Whatever. He'll choke it down.
Me? Not so much. If its not good, I'm not eating it! Can't make me.
Sometimes, going with the flow doesn't help all that much. I like banana chips, but they're coated in sugar and don't get mushy. Otherwise, I can only have bananas plain. No compromising. No banana ice cream-that stuff should be burned.
Anyway, good luck choking the rest down! I'm sure my pep-talk helped a little. Maybe.
If it's from Costco, it has to be good for you. There's a law about that, I think. Anyway, you can always send them to me.
Dude I like banana laffy taffy as well, because it's ONLY banana flavored!
And ya, contaminatory is a fantastic word, I'm glad I came up with it. It is exactly like malevolent.
Hhahahahaha anything from Costco is healthy. That's awesome.
Thanks for the pep talk! I will think hipster/healthy thoughts while I eat them.
Good luck with that. The problem with making a bad decision at Costco is that it lasts for a very long time. I'm just about to finish a box of trash bags I got four years ago at Costco, and I'm nowhere near finished with a box of fabric softener sheets.
I'm totally branching and doing a post about Costco because I am lol'ing right now about all the Costco comments. Thanks H.
Dude saying malevolent out loud makes you sound seductive. There's no way to say it and not. It's the perfect word (minus it's actual meaning).
I DO love sushi! And you know Allie isn't doing it because she's cool because she's the only one of her friends who eats it, and I don't think 2 year olds get that whole "be cool and part of the in crowd" thing. If she did, I'd be able to potty train the dang child.
I, however, am totally with you Heidi, and I despise banana flavor in combination with anything (although I don't even really like bananas except for real ones.) And nuts should NEVER be allowed near my chocolate, or my brownies, or my cookies, or anything as precious to me as those desserts. Contaminatory indeed.
Haha good for Allie and her developing of her own tastes early on! That's how I discovered my banana aversion.
Kara I'm SO glad you agree with me about the nuts in the desserts! I sometimes feel like my view point on this is attacked so I'm glad we can stand strong together! (Except I do like the peanut coating on drum sticks....that's the only nut thing I can think of though.)
Totally agree with you about the nuts contaminating everything!
Pickles are the same way..you can take the pickles off but you'll always always taste them. "Contaminating from beyond the grave" is the perfect description.
I agree with you.
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