Looking Back - 2009

This is incredibly out of order seeing as I haven't done Christmas yet but that one will take some time and this one I've been thinking about more. I decided I'm going to list all the things I can remember about 2009. I figure if I can remember them then they were important and meant a lot to me.

* At the beginning of the year I moved with my sister Abbey into a new house. This actually took place the previous November but January when I came back to school is really when I moved moved in. That was my favorite house to live in while I was in Arizona for many different reasons (living with Sarah is tied). First I love Queen Creek. I know it's way the heck out there but it was my favorite. And I loved that I had a huge room where I could work out in one part and not be working out on my bed. I also really like living with Abbey and Ben. I'm sure they weren't as happy about it as I was but that time especially was really good. I remember having a big conversation with my mom about me living with them knowing I would be leaving and how hard that would be. Well it was hard and Kyndal being really close to me is tough but I wouldn't have traded it for anything. Abbey was my best friend that semester and still is.
* I discovered that the thing I hate most in the world is trying to describe how awesome I am in personal statements for grad school applications.
* I flew to Michigan in March to look at the grad school and had a panic attack on the air plane about how far away I was going, how alone I would (I thought) be, and how I really wasn't good enough to go to grad school because Michigan was the only place that accepted me. That was also the weekend that I realized Michigan was where I wanted and needed to be and I was calm. Probably because I decided to shelve leaving indefinitely. I couldn't even talk about leaving. I left that all out. I planned for it but couldn't talk or even think about all I was leaving.
* I graduated. I spent probably 75 hours on 9 portfolios detailing my proficiency in those 9 areas to a specific level. They were awesome. I think I was more proud of them than anything else just because they took so much of my time and energy. And they were what was standing between me and graduation. I also graduated Summa cum Laude which I wasreallyproudofbutdidn'twanttoshowoff. It's been 7 months and it still hasn't hit me that I have a degree. But every once in a blue moon I think to myself huh you Heidi have a degree. This graduation was also way more exciting than high school graduation although my speech then was pretty awesome.
* I rafted down the Grand Canyon. Coolest thing I've done and one of the most fun. Such fun people to hang out with and a beautiful place. It's my happy place that I go to now.
* We had an awesome family vacation in Pagosa Springs. We spent one whole week there just relaxing, walking, getting yelled at by old men, and taking pictures. Awesomeness.
* My mom drove with me to Michigan the beginning of July and helped me move in. I was really grateful that she came up and was able to help me get situated. I'm sure I was probably not as good at showing that appreciation as I should have been but that was because I was really stressed. It was good.
* I tried to get used to Michigan. I have met so many awesome people and without them I totally would have fallen apart. I missed my family and friends SO bad. It has been nice to be on my own and getting to know new people and new things, but part of me really misses the comfort zone I had. Hopefully this will become another comfort zone for me.
* I wanted to quit grad school. I was terrified I couldn't do and I didn't know what to do. But then numerous people told me I could and I am living on borrowed faith until I believe it too.
* I learned how tragic some things can be watching some of my amazing friends. I cried with them and for them and prayed for them every day. They became my heroes and I hope I can be a good friend to them.
* I realized how much I love everyone in my life. Love them so much it hurts and I wish I could hug them all. I need them so much and I can only try to be as good a friend to them as they have been to me.

It had it's ups which were some of the best ever. And it had its downs which have been the worst. But if it taught me anything it was to cherish the good things while they're happening and save them up for when the bad things are happening. And no matter what smile, I don't know how but it helps.